Definition of dating in a relationship
Most people who are dating or in relationships agree that the feeling of chemistry is real, but not everyone places the same value on it.
On the other end of the spectrum, people might say, "there was so much chemistry right away" or "we both just felt it." Interaction progresses from there, sometimes leading to successful, happy relationships, and other times to years of difficult interactions.
It's similar to breadcrumbing—when someone sends flirtatious, but non-committal signals (breadcrumbs) in order to keep someone interested when he or she has no actual desire to pursue them.
Cushioning, however, according to the Urban Dictionary, is defined as being in a relationship or seriously dating someone, yet also keeping around several "cushions"—aka people you text, flirt with, or even date—to cushion the blow if your main relationship doesn't last.
But once I bid adieu to these three guys and set off into the “real” world of dating — which was filled with terms like “seeing each other” and “not looking for anything serious” — I realized very quickly that defining the relationship didn’t always follow my breakneck speed. Being someone prone to extreme behavior, I went in the complete opposite direction.
I tried my hardest to be cool and not worry about defining the relationship.
Some people don't even see it as a good thing initially.
Below are several types of compatibility we often characterize as chemistry—some being more important than others—along with suggestions for ways to take a closer look at what's driving these feelings. It might be more accurate to call it chemistry at first sight.
Earlier this year, several young women shared their stories of cushioning for the UK's , with one woman saying that even though she spent every night with her now boyfriend while she was dating him, "I had at least two or three guys that I was stringing along in the occasion that things didn't work out." NEWS: Breadcrumbing Is Way Worse Than Ghosting—and Here's How to Avoid It WATCH: Coinage: Why Are Engagement Rings So Expensive But, she didn't cut anyone off after they became official.
She continued, "And even now that we're officially (and happily, might I add) dating for over a year, I'm definitely guilty of keeping the occasional guy around who so blatantly flirts with me and would hop in at the chance, half because I don't mind the attention but mainly because if things didn't work out I'm glad I know I would have a floating device when the ship goes down." While there are many reasons people do it (the relationship is no longer going well or simple insecurity, for example), cushioning at its core is a tactic to try to prevent getting hurt.
And it is my conviction that the wordly system of dating, as it is currently conducted by most people, is far from God's original plan, as described in the Bible.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating